I went to one daughter's therapy appt. on Wednesday. She has herself so closed off that she wanted me to explain to the therapist how she has these "non-feelings". I didn't mind getting the ball rolling for her. I started and then let her carry the conversation. I think she just felt more comfortable having me in the room. If she has a hard time talking to me about things, well it's just that much harder with someone she hardly knows. It was also good because then the therapist was able to ask me questions about her younger years that she doesn't really have clear memories on or was too young to remember. They are going to continue working on it to see if they might be able to pinpoint the block there. So now all my daughter had to do was break the news to the boyfriend. She's been avoiding him all week and he knows it. Well they finally had that phone converesation, took all of two minutes. He kind of beat her to the punch. And then two days later his FB status showed he had a new girlfriend. Ouch. She said it stung a little to see herself replaced that quickly.
The other big thing was the husband and the older one. He was in one of his "if it's not mine and it doesn't belong here, I'm just going to throw it moods". One of my favorites. He'll find a pair of shoes in the living room that belong to one of the girls and just throw them in the general direction of their rooms. Same thing with a shirt, makeup, a book, whatever. I just found out on Wednesday that many times the youngest is the only one home when he does this and if it's her sister's stuff she goes around and picks it up so that he won't yell and throw things. In fact I found out that many afternoons she spends at home just trying to keep the peace so he doesn't start yelling. I tried to explain to her that she didn't need to put that pressure on herself, it wasn't her job and she shouldn't be doing things just so "he won't yell". But on to Sunday. the one who always thinks she's right was out late last night. Once she dropped off her friends and got home it was after 3. And she had to work this morning at 10. When she got home this afternoon all she wanted to do was eat and go to sleep. But he started in on her. Complaining on how he had asked her to do this or that the other day and she didn't. And if she was tired it was her own fault. At that point I left and went to Sam's Club muttering something under my breath about how I didn't want to listen to this shit.
When I'm out I don't really pay much attention to my cell phone. Not my favorite thing. Well I noticed that I had a voice mail. So I listened to it. It was the husband telling me that I had probably already heard what happened, that I was taking her side and he was the bad guy as usual but would I call him. I also noticed the one who knows everything had tried to call and sent me a text asking me to answer my phone. There was another text from the youngest telling me she couldn't take listening to the two of them scream so she left and went to the park.
So I called the husband first. I told him I had no idea what he was talking about as he was the first one I was talking to. Guess he was giving her the lecture about how she doesn't do enough around here and how she's living under his roof... Well, she was overtired and not in a good mood, which he acknowledged and I guess it got heated. She told him to fuck-off. He called her a bitch. Something about him grabbing her arm. She saying she was calling the police, he saying he was going to call the police. You know just the conversation I wanted to have as I walked around Sam's Club.
He even mentioned to me that she was overtired. That's when I pointed out to him if he knew that why did he even start this conversation with her. He had to know it was going to end bad. The message might have been one he needed to talk to her about but the timing was bad. So why was he surprised that it ended bad. I told him I wasn't taking sides. He also told me that she had left. He didn't know where she went but she told him she wasn't coming home until I came home.
So I called her next. She was having one of her girlfriends pick her up and she would be home later.
This what passes for normal in our house.
No comments:
Post a Comment